


How to Parent Your Teenage Alchemist

by Royalsciencenerd



Category: Rapunzel's Tangled Adventure (Cartoon)
Genre: Can someone please explain to me why that's not a tag but Bad Parent Quirin is, Gen, Good Parent Quirin, he's doing his best, let the man live, parenting help books, what do y'all have against Quirin
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-28
Updated: 2020-08-28
Packaged: 2021-03-07 02:00:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,408
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26159173
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Royalsciencenerd/pseuds/Royalsciencenerd
Summary: Parenting a child prodigy who loves alchemy and explosions is hard. Parenting a teenager is harder. Parenting Varian, well, you get the picture....A look at Quirin's growth as a parent through the parenting advice books he buys.
Relationships: Eugene Fitzherbert | Flynn Rider & Varian, Quirin & Varian (Disney)
Comments: 21
Kudos: 76





	How to Parent Your Teenage Alchemist

**Author's Note:**

> This is, by far, my favorite thing I've ever written. I don't know, I have a soft spot for Quirin- he really is trying his best; he just doesn't know how to communicate with his son. 
> 
> This fic is definitely based on the time I myself found my mom's secret stash of parenting advice books, all of them aimed towards helping me. And my mom is my s1 Quirin (we all have one). So I wrote a fic... tada.... 
> 
> I hope y'all enjoy! :D

The first book Quirin buys is an obvious choice: You’re Doing It All Wrong: a Guide to Being a Single Parent. Ulla has not come back for months now. She has been declared dead by all except Quirin, and her young son, Varian. And while Quirin doubts he will ever give up hope on his wife returning, he knows he needs to focus on the here and now- for Varian’s sake.

A week later, he returns to the book shop to pick up a new book: They’re Gone: How to Explain Death to Your Young Child. He hopes he’s made the right choice.

~~~~~~

It’s been years since Quirin has visited the bookshop for parenting advice, but once again he finds himself perusing the shelves, seeking wisdom. He finds it in a book called: Explosions and Escapades: Your Son’s Destructive Teenage Years. Varian’s only 10, but his alchemy has reached a new height of destruction, and Quirin’s beginning to realize it’s not just a phase. So he purchases the book. And if he happens to also purchase The Safe Scientist: A Complete Guide to Science Safety, he could argue that it was a two for one special. Plus, at this point, he knows his son. This is just responsible parenting.

~~~~~~

After the black rocks appear, Quirin disguises his bookshop run as checking in with the store owner to make sure he’s alright. The bookshop owner smiles knowingly at Quirin, and points to a new shipment of parenting materials out on display. Quirin sighs. He wishes he wasn’t this predictable.

This time, he finds help in Mother vs. Teenager: Who Really Does Know Best?. Quirin almost passes by it, given the title, but after reading the summary: a guide to protecting your rebellious teenager from your own dangerous past and mistakes, he snatches it up. The book store owner simply smirks as he stamps Quirin’s frequent purchaser card. Quirin rolls his eyes. On the bright side, he’s only one book purchase away from a free book.

~~~~~~

After Quirin is freed from the amber, Varian is… distant. Hesitant…. Unsure…. Withdrawn…. Everything Varian isn’t supposed to be. His son is a shadow of his former self. Quirin spends his days attempting to comfort his son, listening to him when he needs him, hugging him every chance he gets, but it never seems to be enough. Quirin has missed so much in his year of imprisonment, including his son’s own incarceration. Most of which Varian won’t talk about, and when he does- he gets this distant look on his face.

So Quirin once again finds himself at the bookstore, purchasing Intimate Conversations with an Inmate, So Your Kid Went to Prison, and using his free book to get a book called Understanding and Support: How to Help Your Loved One With PTSD. While checking out the bookshop owner slides him a small booklet titled, You’ll Be Okay: A Guide to Mending Broken Relationships. Quirin digs extra coins out of his pouch, but the book store owner merely shakes his head.

“You’re both going to be fine, as long as you have each other,” he murmurs. “I hope this shows you that- it’s on the house.” Quirin merely nods, blinking tears out of his eyes. Collecting his books, he turns to head home to his son. Varian needed him. Almost as much as he needed Varian.

~~~~~~

A few months later, and Varian’s doing much better. Quirin and his son have patched up their relationship, and while it wasn’t all thanks to the books – they certainly helped. Unfortunately, part of Varian doing better means he’s spending more and more time with his friends. Which is fine- Quirin supports that. His son had never been big on friends before, minus Ruddiger, so if he wants to spend some time with some non-raccoon human friends, then go for it! Quirin’s happy for him. Really!

Except these friends keep putting him in mortal danger, which he is less fine with. It’s one thing to face down the undead protectors of some treasure with the rest of the kingdom having his back, but it’s another to get trapped in a shell with some other kids, or to almost fall to his death multiple times trying to stop the red rocks (even if he was proud of his son for helping to save the kingdom). But getting kidnapped- Quirin’s getting too old for this kind of nonsense. His heart can’t take it.

He merely nods in greeting to the bookshop owner, and heads directly for the parenting section. There’s no sense of mystery why he’s here anymore. He finds answers in a book titled, So Your Kid’s Friends Put Him in Needless Danger and He’s Fine with It. Quirin sometimes wishes he could meet the people who wrote these books- he feels like they’d be good friends. Maybe they could start a support group, since they get each other so well.

Shaking his head, Quirin pays for the book and leaves. Here’s hoping it could help him keep his son out of mortal peril in the future.

~~~~~~

Quirin pays one last visit to the bookstore before he moves into the castle with Varian. The princess was kind enough to hire him as his son’s assistant, and while he doesn’t want to disappoint her, he definitely doesn’t want to disappoint his son. He wants to make his son proud (author’s note: in the words of Michael Scott: Well… well… well… how the turn tables…).

So he purchases a copy of The Amateur Alchemist, hoping that it’ll provide him with enough knowledge to impress his son. He just wants to show Varian how much he cares. That’s always been his goal, but he’s gotten better at achieving it recently. He smiles at the bookshop owner as he leaves, thanking him for all his help over the years.

The bookshop owner simply smiles and says, “Don’t thank me friend, it’s the books that give us hope.” Exiting the shop, Quirin finds himself believing that with all his being. For when things seemed dark, these books were here to guide him, provide him answers when he had none. And now they give him hope for a bright future with his son. One in which they’ll achieve great things together.

~~~~~~

It’s a little over 20 years later when Varian finds himself cleaning out his old home in Old Corona. Dad had always insisted they keep the place, even though they lived in the castle. Now, with him gone, Varian had decided it was time to let it go. In boxing up his dad’s things, Varian finds himself in front of his father’s bookshelf. Perusing the books, he finds book after book of parenting advice, all based on helping him. Tears well up in his eyes as he takes book after book off the shelf.

Emmett, sensing his distress, curls up in his lap, nuzzling his chest. “Thanks, buddy,” Varian whispered. “I just miss my dad, just like I’m sure you miss yours.” Emmett pushed his nose into Varian’s chin. Varian giggled, “You’re so much like you father- the perfect emotional support raccoon. Ruddiger would be proud!”

“Hey now! Speaking of emotional support- how ya doing kid?” Eugene entered the room, carrying boxes. Setting them down, he knelt next to Varian. “I’m not exactly a kid anymore, Eugene,” Varian smiled.

Turning back to the books in his hands, he sighed. “My dad really cared about me. Growing up, I always thought he thought I was a nuisance, or some crazy wild child he didn’t understand. I never knew he tried so hard. I mean, I knew he loved me, but I never knew he cared this much.” With that, Varian gestured at the stack of parenting books.

Eugene picked up the first few and skimmed the titles. “Kid, if I’ve learned one thing, it’s that dads can care about you, but not always know how to show it.”

Varian frowned, “Maybe it’s a Dark Kingdom thing….” Turning back to the books, Varian sighed. “I just miss him, Eugene. I know we didn’t really understand each other at first, but after the amber…. Seeing these books now, I feel like I wasted so much time.”

Eugene pulled his friend into a hug. “I know, Varian. But you can’t dwell on what might have been- you have to hold on to what you have.”

Varian nodded, finally letting his tears flow. “Thanks, Eugene.”

“Hey! Anything for Team Awesome!”

**Author's Note:**

> Before anyone roasts me on Emmett's name, please know I agonized over names for an hour and went to at least 20 different websites to try to find a good name. So, just keep that in mind. It's the best I could do....
> 
> Also, I know raccoon fathers usually don't help take care of their young (y'all should see my search history, it's literally all questions about domesticated raccoons thanks to fanfiction), but this is fanfiction so just pretend with me. 
> 
> Shout out to the random unnamed book shop owner (naming one new character took all my mental brain-power, lol). Also, all these books are fake to the best of my knowledge (so please no one sue me). 
> 
> As always, feel free to let me know what you thought! :D


End file.
